happyone's Diaryland Diary

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No Pets, No Kids

My little sister has always loved babies. As a teen, she would immediately notice if a baby was in the vicinity whenever we went anywhere. She’d then spend most of the time out staring and smiling at said baby. In college, she worked at a daycare in the infant room and she had to take care of 6 infants by herself and she LOVED it, even when the babies wouldn’t stop crying or she was covered in baby puke.

She’s now 29 and very much excited to start a family of her own. She’s planning to get pregnant next summer and is already reading books about preparing for pregnancy and stuff. Our mom, who lives just 8 minutes away from her, is already excited and prepared to provide free babysitting. Her husband makes plenty of money already and he’s in line for a big promotion that would make over $100k a year, allowing my sister to work part time.

Nick’s best friend from childhood just called today to tell him that he and his wife are going to be parents soon. We just went to their wedding in NY back in December. Now both of Nick’s best friends will have children.

I don’t get to be a part of the parent club. Nick doesn’t want kids with me and he doesn’t even want us to have a dog or cat. I will just be the fun aunt to everyone else who has husbands that want kids and their own family.

It’s not like I’m even physically healthy enough to have a kid. I need to lose at least ~53 lbs to even consider it. Since I know I have a husband that doesn’t want kids and who loves Big Beautiful Women (BBW), I really don’t have any incentive to lose weight.

Even if we wanted a kid, we couldn’t afford it. Nick is sitting here at home after being unemployed for a month and he has no prospects for any new jobs because he didn’t graduate from college and he doesn’t have any special training or skills. Any job he would get wouldn’t be some lucrative thing, it would be “just enough” to pay his share of bills. We don’t earn enough as a couple to be able to financially provide for one.

I guess it’s a blessing in disguise that we won’t have kids so we don’t have to subject them to some sad, poor life.

I know I said I would be more positive, but this is just what’s going on right now.

In positive news, I was selected as the “Support Professional of the Year” for the high school I work at. It was very nice to be nominated and to win! Maybe I should throw myself into my work since it’s the only thing I will have to give my life meaning.

5:19 p.m. - Saturday, May. 30, 2020

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