Jing Jing

I am writing this quickly while N has gone to pick up our Chinese food. I have drunk a whole bottle of red wine and have moved on to another. Sadly, I think my tolerance has risen because one big bottle of wine doesn't do it for me like it used to, even on an empty stomach. It's not even like I've drank a lot lately! Oh well.

N is going to the town he used to live in to visit a friend. It's an hour and a half away, so he'll be spending the night and coming back tomorrow night. I see that as a good thing because for some reason, N has been getting on my nerves. I think it'll be good for him to get out of town, for us (me) to have some space. Plus, I have that dreadful final grad school project to finish up anyway. CAN'T WAIT TO GET THAT OVER WITH.

I just hope N doesn't do drugs while he's away. He was so into smoking weed when he was with this friend that I'm afraid he'll smoke weed while he's with him this weekend. N gave up weed back in November, so I'd just hate for him to regress, especially since he's trying to get a better job. Most "better" jobs do drug screenings, so if he gets high, he'll fail and not be able to move forward in life.

I know N wants to do better in life, but him going to visit this particular friend has me worried. This particular friend is in his early 30s, but is $90K in debt, lives with his dad, and smokes weed. Not exactly a model citizen for doing well on your own. I just hope N doesn't get caught up in old, bad habits on this trip.

But if he does, that's N's problem, not mine. We are not married or engaged, so his problems are his own; I still have a way out if he chooses a life of trouble and hardship.

Hmmm, I guess we will see. I'm looking forward to N leaving because we haven't been getting along 100% lately. We've been getting along 90%, which is still great, but I'd still love for him to take a trip and leave me alone for a bit, aha.

6:29 p.m. - Friday, Mar. 21, 2014


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